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Breaking up

Breaking Bad with HR

One of Human Kind's greatest mysteries - at least, for me - is their Resources (Human Resources) and the psychologists that come with it. Such a terrifying covenant.  Every time you have to deal with them, you are awarded with freaky surprises, such as questions that have nothing to do with or what you are doing or applying for, like a job position or a university degree.
They can make you feel threatened to a level where you can swear there are no correct answers, or even good ones. One wrong step and you are done. It is just too much pressure, when your future may be at stake. My best guess is that these questions, these WTFs moments and how you deal with them is what is really being evaluated, that would make sense, but it would also find them the best candidate? 
Well, wrong or not, here is my answer to one of the many encounters I had with these situations. 
* Hypothetical Question (they always go for the let's pretend stuff card) *
Pretend that you have to break up with your boyfriend/girlfriend, please write your best breakup letter here!
Dear, You. 
I thought the best way of starting this letter was quoting a few lines from "We Are the World", but when I got to the second one, my idea went Fubar.
You know. Sigh. Honey. There comes a time when we heed a certain call. But I don't see we coming together as one. Not anymore.
Is it you? Is it me? I don't know. Maybe... Maybe it's us. I just don't feel the same anymore. And I don't want you to waste your time with someone that is not in the same page as you. Or even in the same book category.
This. Breaking up with you. It is the hardest thing I ever did. It is even harder than the thing I'm doing next, with my life. I'm off to Mars. Yes. The red planet famous for creating green life forms. The good part, for you, is that you'll never, ever, have to worry about bumping into me again, on the streets. Unless the space shuttle makes a wrong turn. If so, watch where you're going. 
I'm sorry for ending what we had with a letter - and also for ruining such a good song for you.
PS: I'm sorry for disappearing for years and for you receiving this letter only after I got to Mars :P
PPS: I never went to Mars. Mua ha ha!
THE END
If you are wondering if I got the job. Nope. I fell into another one of the HR's traps. The ruse called "Wage Expectations Wile". Even being a strong candidate (their words and probably true), they said I asked for too much money. And, of course, they did not try to negotiate. That, my friends, would be too rational. 
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